If you dont go to hell, who will ? – Ch 36.1

Ok a rant. It takes a lot of effort to translate a novel in a language I don’t know. And I don’t get any money for this. Instead I get brickbats.

First , there are people pasting my translations in Wattpad without asking my permission . I mean , come on ! Then of course I have the wonderful aggregators , which in this case doesn’t even point to my website

Now a reviewer on NU says mtl is turd. I mean honestly , I would be overjoyed if people were reading novels in my language. I would not put them down. Anyway , I give up!!!! I increasingly feel I should just stop translating. … seriously. I love the novel and I love the comments some of my readers make , but increasingly I feel it’s not worth the effort. Rant over..

Chapter 36 – I really like him

Zhong Yuan asked me: “Mu er, do you like me?”. I didn’t even have to think about it and immediately  blurted out, “ What nonsense! That would be like abusing myself!”

At that time, the teacher on the podium suddenly called out, “ The two students at the back , please pay attention to the class.”

I kept quiet.

As I walked back in the evening, my mind was whirring with the words Zhong Yuan had uttered, “Mu er, do you like me?”

No! Was it possible that I really liked him? That would be horrible!

He was already oppressing me day and night with his incessant demands. If I liked him, this would never be over. And if I liked him and he didn’t, would it not be terribly humiliating?

The most important point to note was that this guy had strange tastes. He had a lofty vision  was always looking down on me. That meant he would definitely not like me. So If I liked him, I was destined to the tolerate the bitterness of unrequited love. I went over y emotions the other day and concluded that it was natural for a girl to feel shy when a guy was kissing her . It did not , in anyway, indicate my fondness of him.

This thought finally calmed me down and I went to sleep

……

Recently, I had encountered a very troublesome thing. I had chosen tennis for this semester’s physical education class, and I soon realised what a big mistake this was. The main problem was that our Phy Ed teacher was a very serious person. She was planning to check our serves next week. Anyone who did not perform well would have their marks deducted. I was very worried about this matter. When I complained to Zhong Yuan , he patted my shoulder and calmly said,  “ I will teach you.”

I suddenly remembered that I was supposed to partner Zhong Yuan in sports and studies, and one of the sports he had selected was tennis. But then I had hidden in the self- study hall all day out of resentment and he had not been able to find me.  So I excitedly pulled his hand and smiled with all my charm, “ Zhong Yuan is so amazing!”

He looked at me trying to butter him up and smiled smugly, “ How will you repay me?”

Yikes! I knew this guy was up to something. Of course as a person who was very familiar with him , I had nothing to say, “ What do you want?”

He thought for a while and then waved his hand generously, “Forget it, just come with me to pick apples in the garden during the weekend.”

I couldn’t help but sigh. Zhong Yuan you are too devious! Then I scratched my head and asked him, “ Aren’t you going to be busy with the shooting?”

Zhong Yuan replied casually, “ Su Yan’s face is still swollen. It is impossible to shoot anything till it goes down.”

Aren’t you even a little bit embarrassed, Zhong Yuan?

……

Zhong Yuan wore a white sportswear with light green wrist bands on the wrists and he looked like a hero. When he arrived on the tennis court, all the females in the surrounding areas turned their attention to him. It seemed that the girls in this year were members of the ‘Looks are all’ club. Actually, I was too.

But Zhong Yuan was not perturbed with all the attention and felt no pressure at all. He calmly held the racket and slowly swung it in the air. Then he started explaining, “ Your body should be at a forty five degree angle. Pay attention to your balance. Stretch your arms to the front. The racket and the body needs to be at the same angle. Then swing the racket. Pay attention to the mesh surface when you swing. Keep moving forward. Use your whole arm instead of just the wrist movement to swing, otherwise you will injure yourself. Don’t stop in the middle of the swing…use the inertia of motion of the racket.. ok.. now you try.”

Zhong Yuan and the physical education teacher spoke at the same time. I understood a bit, but not all of it. At this point, I was strangely nervous. I grabbed the racket  and held it but realised I didn’t even know how to hold the racket properly.

Zhong Yuan shook his head, “ I really admire you. After such a long class, you don’t even know how to hold the racket?”

I was dismayed. I changed my posture and held the racket, but my grip was awkward.

Zhong Yuan sighed. He dropped his own racket, then came forward and put his fingers over mine to correct the grip. As he adjusted my grip, he whispered, “ Why is your hand so small?”

I looked at his slender fingers over mine. I could feel my heart jumping in my chest and my breathing become uneven. Zhong Yuan did not seem to realise my strangeness. He helped me correct my grip, then lifted his hand and knocked on my head. He smiled and said, “ Why are you so lost?”

“ No, nothing” I shook my head shyly, I stepped back a few steps and started swinging the racket for practice.

Zhong Yuan stood in the same position and looked at me. When I was no longer moving my hand he asked me,  “ What happened?”

I pulled my hand and panted. “I am tired.”

Zhong Yuan was clearly gloating, “Didn’t I tell you to follow what I am doing?”

I cried and replied, “ I can’t learn. I thought I understood what you said, but when I try to do it, its difficult.”

Zhong Yuan came over. He grabbed my hand and held the racket. Then suddenly, he pulled me in his arms!

What kind of situation is this ?

The girls around screamed at this sudden move. I looked up at Zhong Yuan in panic, but this time, he didn’t look at me. I could just see his chin from my vantage point. I was so nervous that my legs were soft. I gulped, ‘ You…”

His voice was cold but clear, “ I am helping you correct your swing. Any problem ?”

My mind at this moment was completely blank. I mechanically replied, “ No, no problem.”

He put his hand over mine holding the racket. His other hand was on my shoulder. He took my hand and rotated it backwards. I couldn’t help but take a step back. Immediately, he complimented me, “ That’s it!”

Then he brought my arm forward. “ This arm doesn’t need to be straight. Just keep it at a certain angle so that you can manoeuvre it. You’re doing great Mu er!”

What was I doing? It was obviously you doing all this from start to finish!

As he swung my arm forward, the movement was smooth. Then he looked down at me and asked, “ Now have you learnt it?”

I didn’t know what to say. Zhong Yuan’s breath was on my neck. Suddenly, I felt a twitch in my neck. I felt a bit hot and uncomfortable. But he kept his position and did not move. I was feeling strange. I looked up at him. His eyes were focussed on me, as if they could penetrate all my thoughts. The heat in it seemed like it would melt anything in its way. I didn’t dare to look directly at him anymore and lowered my eyes.

“ Mu er”, Zhong Yuan murmured, “ You aren’t paying attention.”

I kept my gaze lowered as I didn’t know how to answer this question.

“ You really don’t like me?”

I kept quiet.

“ If that is true, I wont mind”, he whispered softly.

There was a strange sensation rising in my heart.

“ Please, there must be some limit to your ego”

Once I finished saying this, I struggled away from his grasp and turned away, racket in hand.

Zhong Yuan blocked me from the front and I almost hit his chest. He looked at me, “ Are you angry?”

I lowered my eyes, “ Do I dare be angry at you?”

“ You look as if I bullied you.”

I was upset, “ Of course you bully me.”

Zhong Yuan patted my shoulder, “ It’s alright. I was just joking.”

I kept my head lowered with a sullen, “ Doesn’t matter.”

I didn’t know why I suddenly got angry, and I didn’t understand why there was a sense of loss in my heart after Zhong Yuan explained that he was just kidding.