First part of chapter 31. The angst continues. BB can no longer ignore YZ, but will they be able to return to how it was before? I still owe Lolee and Pink for their reviews but I am going to try and do those chapters over the weekend.
Gong Xi Fa Cai in advance for those of you who are celebrating..
Chapter 31: The lies we tell
I gritted my teeth till it hurt. In my heart, I cried out, I cannot! He has a fiancée. He has a fiancée.
But instead I said,” What did you think I was doing? I am just going to get you some soup.”
I felt like slapping myself. This wasn’t good. No medicine could save me from myself.
“ I want to eat pork ribs and melon soup. Put more ribs”, he called out in a clear voice.
Ugh! I must have owed him in my previous birth.
It was summer, and the day was exceptionally hot. I rode my bike to the supermarket. Sweating like a pig, I bought a pile of ribs, beef and a variety of fruits and vegetables. Then I went home to cook
The pot slowly simmered while I stared at the rising heat and the soup bubbling in the pot.
I didn’t know if what I was doing was right.
I didn’t know what Yu Yin really was in the eyes of Ye Zhengchen.
I was a mere human, not god. When I saw a man I loved torturing himself to unconsciousness, when I saw him wake up and make a confession, how could I not be touched? How could I still emotionlessly tell him, I do not want to be with you ?
But just because I couldn’t bury my feelings for him did not give me a reason to accept this relationship. After all, there was a bonafide fiancée between us.
In the past, I was unaware of the truth
Now the facts had been laid plainly in front of me. How would I face Yu Yin, Ye Zhengchen’s real fiancé?
The more you were afraid of something, the more likely that you would face it.
At noon, when I walked into the ward with the soup, I saw Yu Yin in the ward.
I had never encountered such a depressing scene
Three people were in the same room, of which one pair were genuinely engaged to each other and had known each other for decades.
I didn’t know where to hide.
Seeing me at the door, Yu Yin turned slightly. She was sitting in the bedside chair, elegantly dressed as usual. Her slight smile didnt have even a hint of irony.
It was too late to hide. Bracing myself, I walked to the table and put the container on the table.
“ Brother, the soup is hot. Eat it before it gets cold… uh… I’ll come back later.” I dared not dally any longer and rushed to the door.
“Girl”, Ye Zhengchen called out to me.
I turned back and smiled at him and Yu Yin. My smile was stiff and unnatural.
“ You guys continue talking, I won’t bother you.”
Once I was outside, I closed the door very politely.
Was this the feeling that a third person in a relationship had? I really felt cheap.
Feeling extremely nauseous, I kicked the wall in anger. A spasm of intense pain travelled right upto my central nervous system as soon as my foot touched the wall. I held my ankle while hopping on one leg, tears flowing unrestrained down my cheeks.
Fortunately, no one else saw me or I would be terribly embarrassed.
I limped back to my apartment. The fragrance of ribs melon soup was still hanging in the air.
I realised that I had missed my lunch. I opened the lid of the pot and poured out the remaining soup in a bowl. Then I drank the soup and chewed the bones in an effort to get some calcium in my body
After having my lunch, I dug out the first aid box my father had prepared for me. I found some safflower oil and massaged it into my own ankle.
While massaging, I cursed in my heart, Ye Zhengchen, you have the heart of a cunning wolf, how could you die!
As I cursed him, the phone started to ring. I jumped up to see who it was . I looked at the caller id. Who else could it be but the man with the heart of a wolf.
I was tired , so sitting down on the chair, I received the call.
“ That soup was delicious”, he said, “ what’s for dinner?”
“ Soup made from the fickle heart of a cruel and unscrupulous beast”
He laughed at that. His clear and bright laughter made my heart miss a beat
“ Should I get the ingredients?”
“ What happened to your pretty, elegant and lovely fiancé?”
“ She’s gone. And she won’t come back again.”
I was speechless. I continued slowly rubbing the safflower oil on my ankle.
Seeing that I wasn’t going to comment, he solemnly apologised, “ Girl, I’m sorry. I promise that this situation will never be repeated”
“Ok”, I took a deep breath.
Even if he had the ability to send Yu Yin away, even if that meant that the odd situation I was in today would not repeat, it did not mean that Yu Yin would cease to exist.
She would always be a thorn in my relationship with Ye Zhengchen
“ You don’t believe me?”
I shook my head silently. “ I’ll get dinner for you tonight”
I hung up the phone and absentmindedly continued to rub my ankle.
At night, I made beef soup and carried two bowls to the hospital.
I peeked inside from the door before I went in the ward. Ye Zhengchen was propped up in the bed reading a book. From time to time, he looked at his watch impatiently. He looked better than in the morning, maybe the melon soup contributed in uplifting his mood.
I took a closer look to determine that Yu Yin wasn’t in any corner of the room.
Then I pushed the door open and endured the pain in my ankle to walk in smoothly. The minute Ye Zhengchen saw me, his face lit up.
As soon as I sat down, Ye Zhengchen looked surprised and started sniffing the air. Then he looked at me from top to bottom. His eyes finally paused ay my ankle. “ Did you hurt your foot?”
I was a fool. How did I forget that he was a doctor? I should not have used safflower oil, and I should not have worn a skirt.
He lifted the quilt and patted the place next to him, “ Sit here and let me see”.
He was in the hospital robes, but his posture was like that of an attending physician.Obediently, I sat on his bed, took off my shoes and placed the injured ankle on the bed.
He gently examined the swollen ankle. I couldn’t help reacting when his fingers touched my ankle.
He raised his eyebrows and looked at me , “ How did you hurt yourself/”
I didn’t want to tell him that I had kicked the wall.
He gently wrapped my ankle in his warm palms. I felt an electric current pass through me accompanied with spasms of pain.
I could see is face was pale and that he was blaming himself. That made me realise how much he truly cared about me.
I believed that his feelings for me were genuine
Even if the trust between us was like walls on a beach that would collapse when the storms came in, I would continue reinforcing those walls over and over again
“ Don’t come tomorrow. Just rest in your apartment. For the next three days, don’t walk. And don’t ride your bike for the next one month.”
He instructed me carefully as he gently massaged my ankle.
“Then who will get you food?”
He patted my head and said softly, “ Silly girl!”
I would rather be a silly girl, guarding my happiness in all innocence and remain ignorant for the rest of my life.
He took out my seagull watch from under his pillow and fastened it on my wrist again.
I looked at the minute hand. I wasn’t quite sure what I was feeling, but there was a vacuum in my chest, as if nothing could fill it up
His hand moved slowly from my hand to my face. Then he lifted my face as his lips moved closer to mine..
Just as his lips were approaching mine, the image of Yu Yin suddenly flashed in my mind. A piercing pain shot through my heart and I immediately shifted my face to avoid his kiss
“Are you still angry with me?” , he asked.
I shook my head. Quietly, I moved away from his bed and handed him the bowl of soup.
My innate disposition prevented me from being a third person in a relationship
I could not steal another person’s happiness, nor could I deceive myself. I could not forget that there was another innocent woman who was being affected by all of this for no fault of hers…
So I could only torture myself and him…
Two days later, Ye Zhengchen was discharged from the hospital. I cleaned up the apartment, binned the beer cans and cleaned the floor. I washed the sheets and his clothes till they smelled fresh. When he came in, I was standing on a chair to hang the freshly washed curtains. He picked me up from the chair and threw me on the bed.
“ Didn’t I tell you to rest at home? Why would you climb so high?”
“ Yes, doctor”
I pushed him away, “ Go have a bath and change your clothes”
As soon as he heard the word ‘bath’, his eyes gleamed and he immediately walked to the bathroom
A few minutes later, he came out. Silently, he looked at the closed curtains, then hugged me from behind and pressed me against the wall
His strength was amazing!
How did he recover so well ?
If I wasn’t myself a doctor and I hadn’t seen his pale face, I would think that he had lied to me about his recent illness.
“ Girl..”, his lips were close to my ear as he continued in his rich, magnetic voice, “ do you like me?”
I pushed him away coldly and lowered my face, “ Please stop it”.
Stunned, he took a closer look at my face. There were no signs of jest or desire in my eyes. Reluctantly, he let go of my waist.
Some people suddenly appear in your life just at the moment that you were about to forget them.
One boring afternoon, just as I got out of class, Yu Yin called me. Very sincerely, she said she wanted to talk to me. We decided to meet at the Starbucks outlet near my school. She said, “Dont tell him , he won’t allow me to meet you.”
“ I know”
Compared to the outlets in the commercial district, the Starbucks in the campus was really quiet. There weren’t too many customers, and the few who were there were quietly doing their own thing.
We ordered two cups of coffee and sat down near the window.
He face still had a shallow smile. There was no hint of anger or worries
I have often read of scenes where the fiancée and the lover meet in romance novels. I felt a bit strange and flustered.
I bent my head to drink the coffee , avoiding looking into her eyes.
“ Sometimes, I really admire him..”, Yu Yin started, “ he can control any kind of woman in the palm of his hand.”
If this sentence had not been directed to me, I would have applauded heartily.
The sentence had just the right mix of ruthlessness and poison to pierce a person’s heart.
I wanted to retort, “ I don’t know how many women Ye Zhengchen can control because when he was with me , he did not pay attention to any other woman”
But in view of my current status as a third party, I decided to be low key and said, “ I’m sorry. I must be the world’s stupidest woman. I didn’t even know he had a fiancé”
“Fiance?”, Yu Yin suddenly laughed, “ his fiancé? Is that what he told you?”
I looked up in surprise,” Isn’t that true?”
She didn’t answer but only gave me a sarcastic smile which meant, “ Of course not!”
I was confused. Did Ye lie to me ? No, he would not. This time, what he said was true.
Yu Yin said, “ Did he tell you that he never loved me, that our marriage was forced by our parents, and that he had no choice but to accept? Did he tell you that I like him and that is why I am stalking him?”
I nodded. Wasn’t that true?
“ Do you believe him?”, she looked at me in amazement, as if I was an idiot.
“ Do you really believe that he would get engaged to me even if he did not love me? You really believe that even though I was aware that he did not love me, that he, infact loved you, I would still shamelessly pursue him? Don’t you think thats a bit ridiculous?”
“ I believe him. He will not lie to me.”
Yu Yin smiled, her smile more joyous as my heart became more confused.
“ You know, apart from majoring in clinical practice, he also studied psychology. He can understand the inner workings of human minds, and he uses that to control other people’s behaviour. A normal person can never read him or understand his moods. He can even fool a polygraph.”
Was I that stupid? Was she talking about a normal human being or god?