Loving You is Too Difficult – Ch 8

Chapter 8

PG13 material in this chapter.. be warned!

Since then, everything changed in a manner that none of them could have predicted.Xiang Yu decided that giving Song Yu Shan too much space was not the right strategy. Like always, once he had determined his goal, he wanted to quickly stride towards his goal and achieve it with no room for hesitation. The problem though, was that this time it wasn’t a career goal or an object. Should he not ask her first? After all, she was also a ‘party’ to his goal and her wishes needed to be taken into consideration too!

But she found it very hard to make him understand this. He was a single-minded, goal-oriented person. In fact, in her brief experience, he was the one  who would most closely follow the plan and had the strongest determination. In business, he showed vision, but also the ability to set up detailed short, medium and long term plans, and execute these plans flawlessly to bring his vision to fruition.

This attitude extended to his own life as well.For example, every evening, he would call the library and ask about her plans for the night. What would she be doing? Nothing! Her plans were always to go home, eat something, take a shower, watch tv…

” I have a meeting at 7:00. Have a bite after work. Then wait for me at home and we can have dinner together. The study cabinet should be finished today. Have a look and see if there are any problems. You can watch TV. I’ve written down a list of programs. It’s right next to the cabinet. You can watch one of those…” he explained in detail over the phone.

What was wrong with this person? Why was her life being planned in minute detail by him?

” But I…” Song Yu Shan wanted to protest.

” What?” His voice was low and sexy, very masculine and Song Yu Shan could feel her ear turn warm. She was a stupid, dumb woman. Distracted by his sexy voice, she did not verbalise her protest.

In this manner, day after day, she was lured to his residence. They had dinner together, chatted and watched TV . His house was huge, almost 265 square metres and he was staying alone. On top of that, he had just returned from the United States. He had very few things. He was busy at work and had no time to take care of  the furnishings. As a result, the task of buying furnitures, accessories , etc all fell on Song Yu Shan.

Take the bookcase. After Xiang Yu’s stuff arrived from the US, boxes of books were piled up randomly in the study room. Once when Song Yu Shan was bored, she was rummaging through the books and realised that most of the books were quite expensive.

She could not help but blurt out, ” Don’t you think you should get a bookcase..”

” Then you get one”, he answered immediately.

The next day, she received a call from a lady who had a voice fit for a radio DJ. Miss Hu arrived at the library with a variety of catalogues on book cases.

” But Xiang Yu should have the final say…”. Faced with Miss Hu’s extreme capability , Song Yu Shan had hesitated.

” Sir said Miss Song should decide everything. The material, the colour, the style.. whatever you select, we can then have it  custom built or ready made. This is what he said. Just tell me what you want and I will arrange all that,” she had smiled at Song Yu Shan.

How could she stand in the way of Miss Hu’s competence?

She ended up selecting the book case, the carpet, the audio visual equipment, the refrigerator, kitchen utensils, all kinds of big and small decorations, including the bedding , sheets , pillowcases… At every stage, the only instruction from Xiang Yu was either, ” buy what you like” or ” do you like this? Then buy it.”

But she wasn’t the one who was going to live there. Why did it feel like she was setting up a new home?

In the evening, when he came back, she was very sadly sorting out the books to put them in the bookcase. There was a small bucket and rags next to her. She had been arranging the bookcase for more than an hour.

The new book case had been completed that evening, and naturally there was a lot of dust and wood chips on the ground nearby. The maids had already left for the day. So Song Yu Shan did the cleaning up herself. She wiped the book case once with a damp rag, then with a dry one before placing the books inside.

The book case has been custom built as per her instructions, It occupied one whole wall of the study, from floor to ceiling. When he came in, she was standing on a chair, which in turn, was balanced on a coffee table so she could reach the highest shelves.

” What are you doing!” His angry voice as he entered the study shocked her. But unlike in TV dramas, this did not cause her to  flail and lose her footing and then fall beautifully in the arms of the handsome man. There was a handsome guy in front of her, but the  scowling expression on his face was doing a rather good job of ruining his visual appeal  at that moment. He looked like he was ready to murder her.

” What’s wrong?” she asked, confounded, ” I’m just cleaning the book case. I can’t put in the books before I wipe away the dust. This is what we do in the library!”

” Get down!” His face still had an angry, unhappy look.

” I do this often in the library. Since you don’t have a ladder, I used the table and chair..” Carefully, she stepped down from the chair, then jumped to the ground, landing perfectly like a cat.

He stared at her. She had not wanted her clothes to get dirty, so she had changed into one of his short sleeved t shirts before she started dusting. The sleeves reached almost to her elbows, and the hem reached just below her knees. It was actually quite conservative, but as his eyes surveyed her, she felt strangely exposed.

Pulling down the hem of the t shirt, Song Yu Shan tried to explain, ” I.. I took one of your t shirts. I’ll wash it and give it back..”

He continued to stare silently at her. He was used to seeing her in lacklustre conservative suits. Her hair, that she always wore down , was tied up in a knot. The old T shirt had been washed several times . The soft and translucent fabric clung to her body exposing the delicate curves of her body to his eyes. Any normal man would lose his senses when presented with such a seductive picture.

At first, when he had entered the study, he looked angry and she had felt that he was simply reprising the role of watching out for her  as he had done so many years ago. But now she realised that the annoyance in his eyes had turned into a fire of another kind.

” Don’t keep staring at me. What is wrong?” she asked , squirming uncomfortably.

It seemed to her as if all the air in the room had been sucked out . She was finding it hard to take in air. There was an inexplicable under current of tension in the room. She looked away from  his eyes. trying to ignore the fire she had seen in them.  What was happening? She had always seen peace and calmness in those eyes. But recently, she had often caught him looking at her with a strange intensity, as if she were a fat lamb to be led to slaughter.

“Just.. i just felt strange.” He finally spoke up, his voice low and gravelly. Then his mouth curled up in an unexpected smile, ” Why does this T-shirt look so much better on you than on me?”

” Huh?” Song Yu Shan was taken aback. She hadn’t expected him to make this remark. She looked down at herself incredulously, ” Am I looking good in this ? In this old T shirt?”

” So, depending on who wears it, the effect is different”, he murmured, almost to himself.

” I better change back to my clothes”. She did not dare look at him. She bent to pick up the bucket and rags and then asked him, ” Have you had dinner? There’s some food in the kitchen. Once I change…”

“Wait a minute.”

She didn’t know when he had come up behind her. He reached out and grabbed the bucket and put it aside. Then, with his other arm, he encircled her waist and drew her closer to him. When her back pressed against his chest, she suddenly felt dizzy. Her heartbeats had accelerated so much she felt like her heart would jump right out of her chest.

” I like you in this T shirt”, he said to her in a whisper, his lips breathing hot air in her ear, ” this looks much better than all your pretty clothes.”

“Uhh”, she responded, her brain unable to form meaningful words.

His big hands skimmed her body. From her thighs, they moved upwards under the T shirt, stroking her bottom, then her waist. She squirmed, ” Don’t… this.. tickles..”

He laughed, ” Are you ticklish? Really?”

” Don’t do this.. ah!”

She twisted trying to dodge his touch. But this only caused the friction between the two to become hotter. Both of his hands were now under her clothes, encircling her waist and holding her close to him. Pressed against his body like this, Song Yu Shan had no difficulty realising that he was hard. Her face blushed redder. She closed her eyes and bit her lips in embarrassment.

” If.. if you don’t want this, tell me now”, he said , as he kissed the sensitive shell of her ear. Then he  bit her earlobe lightly, causing her breath to hitch.

Although her brain was no longer functioning at full capacity, she was very clear. She wanted this! She wanted to be hugged by him, to be loved by him, to immerse herself into this strange sweetness.

” Do you?” he kissed her blushing neck and asked again, ” if you don’t want it, it’s going to be really hard for me, but I will respect your decision…”

In answer, Song Yu Shan turned in his arms , hugged his neck, and standing on tiptoes, blocked his lips with hers. He hesitated for a second, then opened his mouth to engulf the small, sweet little mouth with his lips. The long, hot kiss was deep and dominating. His hands continued their exploration. Dazed by his kisses, Song Yu Shan had no idea when his hands had unhooked her bra. When his cool fingertips grazed the bare skin on her chest, she was shocked out of her daze and struggled.

” Don’t be afraid”, Xiang Yu softly whispered against her lips.

She was not afraid.  Subconsciously, she was very confident that he would not harm her. She had nothing to fear from him… except for the fear that someday he would leave her.

Xiang Yu released her lips , which were now red and swollen from his kisses and moved down, kissing her cheeks, her chin. Then he raised her arms, and pulled off the T shirt smoothly. The washed and faded T shirt quietly floated down to the wooden floor.  It was followed by her plain, white bra. Clad only in white cotton panties, Song Yu Shan suddenly felt shy as she realised they were still in the study. The man in front of her was still in his business suit. Embarrassed, she buried her face in his chest. She heard his low laughter and his irregular breathing.

She wondered what she should do next. She had never been with a man before. She had never been close to any one else, and the only man she had desired was one she had given up all hopes of ever meeting again…

Suddenly, she felt weightless as she was lifted in his arms and carried to the master bedroom. Strange, intense feelings coursed through her body , making her feel dizzy and weak at the same time.  When she felt his mouth on her chest. she was suddenly brought back to reality. When did he take off his clothes? When did she get on the bed?

” Uhh”, she moaned, trying to escape his lips, ” be gentle..”

He had tried very hard to restrain himself. But Song Yu Shan’s skin was like a baby’s, soft and delicate, His kisses left red imprints on her body. The little bud on top of her snowy chest had hardened into a sweet berry under the ministrations of lips and tongue. She moved helplessly under him. She felt heated.. and so uncomfortable.

The last barrier, her cotton panties had been taken off and thrown by the bedside. Then his strong and heavy male body pressed against her delicate body. His hardness, her softness – it was the strongest contrast but also the perfect match. Her curves seemed to be built to mould with his body. He was already intensely aroused, and their bodies pressing closely drove him nearly insane.

He had often dreamt of the light lavender fragrance of her body. Her unique auburn hair was spread across the light blue pillow, and he could not help but bury his face in her neck to inhale that special scent of hers. It seemed to him that he had waited a long time for this special moment. Lifting up her legs, he placed them on his waist and prepared for the final act.

“Don’t be scared”, he felt her shiver a little and stared at the fascinating beauty under him. He promised softly, “I will be careful.”

” I’m not scared”, she answered softly.

Either to prove that she was not scared, or driven by pure feminine instinct, she lifted her waist slightly to meet him halfway.

A low roar emerged from the depths of his throat, ” Don’t … move…”

Hearing him so tight and flustered, her lips curled into a pure feminine, delicate and naughty smile. ” I want you.”

Boom! The flame that had been smouldering for so long flared into an inferno, consuming both of them.

He was hungry. It was almost dawn. The sky had lightened, although the sun had not risen yet.  This was his usual time to wake up, but he had never been so hungry. In fact, he was burning with hunger. He could only rationalise this in his mind by saying that he must have consumed a lot of energy last night while.. umm in the act. But this sense of hunger was so acute that he was unable to go back to sleep. The sole reason for this was the other person who was in bed with him.

Her silky, delicate body was pressed against his chest. His arm moved around her waist and hugged her tightly , drawing her back against his body. Both of them were naked, their skins in close contact. Her arms too, tightened against his back. She could sense the change in his breathing.  He turned her around so she was pressed against the mattress with his body on top of hers and entered her again. Although he was heavy, she did not feel uncomfortable. She wished she could cling to him like this forever. She wished that she could be glued to him like this , that they would never need to leave this big bed.

He gasped and whispered in her ear, “Are you ok?”

” Hmm”, she murmured indistinctly. She did not want to move, she did not want to talk. In fact, she did not even have the energy to open her eyes.

” Answer me”. The satisfaction of being deeply immersed in her body made him relax. He wanted her under his body like this forever. But he was worried about her delicate body. Just now.. and before that, last night.. He had promised to love her and slowly guide her to enjoy the pleasures of the body, but he simply could not control himself.

“I’m fine…”

He looked up and kissed her eyes wet with tears, ” Then why are you crying ?Does it hurt?I’m sorry…”

She shook her head, raised her face and kissed him on the lips to block any further questions.He kissed her deeply. Her unique lavender scent mixed with the scent of sex, making her blush. After kissing for a long time, her lips were swollen. Reluctantly, he let go of her.

” You.. aren’t you going to work?”she asked as she stroked his sweaty, black hair.

Although, he had just made love to her, his hunger for her was only increasing. This hunger showed no signs of being satiated. He kissed her again.

” Yes. I need to go to work”, he whispered against her lips, ” but I don’t want to go.”

Song Yu Shan laughed. This was the guy who was always dutiful and responsible, a guy who was never swayed by emotions. He actually said, ” dont want to go!”

” So do you want to stay in bed?” she asked innocently.

” That depends on you,” Xiang Yu leaned down and caught her lips in his own. When the two people pried themselves apart, they were both breathing heavily. Song Yu Shan pushed against his chest, ” No. You must go to work…”

Sighing with frustration and a little bit off annoyance, Xiang Yu exhausted all of his will power to move away from the soft and seductive body.. But as soon as he stood up, he turned around, bent and picked up the woman who was trying to curl up like a shrimp and continue sleeping in the bed..

” I want to sleep!” It felt as if they had returned to the past, when the cute and lovely Miss Song had been wilful. She complained, ” Don’t bother me, go to work..”

“Of course I will go to work. But I have to take a shower before I go.”

Ignoring her struggles, he simply tightened his arms and  carried her to the bathroom. ” You take a shower with me and then go back to sleep.”

” I need to go to the library…”

” Today is Monday. It’s a weekly holiday.” He bent his head to nip at her sensitive earlobe, making her squirm in his arms, ” come and have a bath with me. Don’t fight or I will be late.”

What more could she say? She had always listened to Mr Yu. She was carried into the bathroom. Of course, in the end, it was Xiang Yu who suffered. For the first time in his life, he was late for work.