Chapter 39 – Jealousy

Li’l second conveyed Zhong Yuan’s message, but I didn’t go downstairs to meet him. I really wanted to avoid him at the moment. With my conflicting and confusing mood swings, I was scared to meet him. Anyway, Zhong Yuan was a smart man. I was sure he would not die of starvation even if he did not have his meal card with him. I had decided to confine myself to the dormitory that weekend. I subsisted on a few bags of instant noodles that were near expiry. I had not eaten instant noodles for a long time. Zhong Yuan had high standards for food and he never ate junk food. Since I was with him every day, I had fallen into the same habit.

I poked at the steaming instant noodles in front of me and sighed, why did I think of Zhong Yuan whenever I did something?

I logged into the campus forum out of sheer boredom and typed the word “ Zhong Yuan” into the search box. I wasn’t disappointed. There were several pages of relevant content, ninety percent of which was gossip. Each of these gossips involved some girl or another. Once, I was fortunate enough to be featured in these pages with Zhong Yuan. I remembered that I had requested him to clarify things immediately. Now, when I thought about it, I felt it would have been nice to let things be …

While I thought about this, I clicked on the latest post. The protagonist of this was one of his female classmates. It was said that they were seen doing homework together often which led to cultivation of ‘improper gender relations.’  The post also mentioned that this girl had been the school flower in Zhong yuan’s school. A few pictures of her had been posted in the forum, She looked ok. I personally felt she couldn’t hold a candle to our school flower. Oh, I forgot to mention that our school flower was me!

Ok…ok. I knew this was a very narcissistic thought, but I needed to invigorate my fighting spirit!

As I scrolled through,  I came across some pictures of the lady in question and Zhong Yuan It looked like they were dressed for some formal occasion. The girl’s outfit was beautiful and Zhong Yuan’s clothes fitted him really well. He looked slender and in shape. I was almost drooling! Ah! Love was a really perverted emotion. It made people subsist on instant noodles for years and it also made one think that the other person looked extremely handsome in whatever he did, even sneezing.

Ok. I admit I was very jealous but I had to admit he looked extraordinarily handsome. Most important of all, Zhong Yuan was smiling at her! They were both looking at each other and smiling. The kind of soft smile in his face was not something I had ever seen on him when I was with him. So it was true what people said about boys being attracted to the sexy girls! If I put on makeup, I was sure I would look no less beautiful…

Forget it! Who was I kidding? I had no cleavage worth boasting of!

I closed down the page. I was really depressed now. I knew my emotions were too susceptible to Zhong Yuan’s actions, but I did not know how to control them. I could not stop thinking about him and I could not stop paying attention to his every move.

It seemed my relationship with Zhong Yuan was like that of a hen and chicken. A hen could have many chickens, but a chicken had only one hen. No ! This analogy was inappropriate! It was more like a moon and stars. He was the moon and I was the star. The moon was unique and attractive in everyone’s eyes but there were many stars in the sky.

I kept telling myself that there were already many scandals about Zhong Yuan; that this girl was just one of the many stars that surrounded him, but a voice kept echoing in my head – what if this time it was true?

I was depressed all afternoon as I mulled over this. In the evening, I realised that I had been confined to the dormitory for over two days. I needed to go for a walk and I needed to deflect my thoughts in some other direction. What’s more, after eating instant noodles for two days for all four meals, I felt like I had suffered a huge physical and mental blow. I needed some comfort. I planned to go to the supermarket and use Zhong Yuan’s card to comfort myself from the heartache I suffered because I was desperately missing him.

But in the supermarket, I caught sight of the very person I had been afraid to meet all this time. In addition, he was with the protagonist of the gossip blog. The two of them were laughing as they queued up in front of the cash register. The school flower smiled beautifully, and I could almost see her drooling!

There was a strong sense of discomfort in my heart. I lost the will to buy anything. I quickly turned and left the supermarket. Once outside, I started walking aimlessly on the road, kicking the snow under my feet out of sheer frustration. The scene I just saw was running through my mind, followed by the photos I had seen on the forum. They wore similar clothes, they truly looked like a well-matched couple…

As my frustration amplified, I started thinking increasingly wild thoughts. It was at this point that I bumped into a person. I looked up, intending to apologise, but when I saw who it was, instead of saying sorry, I just looked at him with my mouth gaping wide.

Then anger took over. I sneered at him,  “ Why are you alone? Where is the school flower?”

Zhong Yuan looked at me quietly, then curled his lips upward in a slight smile. “ Are you jealous?”

At being exposed, I was both angry and embarrassed. “ What nonsense!” I exclaimed.

But as soon as those words were out of my mouth, I was suddenly pulled into his arms. His strong familiar arms engulfed me.

Zhong Yuan rested his chin on the top of my head as he tightened his arms around me. Then he sighed softly and almost whispered, “ All my internal organs are twisting in pain. Why don’t you understand?”

Miumiu – Aha ! So we still have Zhong Yuan confessing first. He has been trying to manipulate Mu er to say those words first but she’s just too low in confidence to understand his feelings for her. She’s been torturing herself with thoughts of how he would make fun of her. Poor Mu er!.

The next chapter is my favourite where we see ZY’s POV. It’s not in first person, but nevertheless, it shows just how much ZY cares and when he first started falling in love. Frankly Ch 40 is my favourite because I’m a sucker for caring men 🙂 I don’t want to oversell it though… let me know your thoughts in the comments section. Maybe because this novel is quite straight forward, I don’t see too many cmments but frankly that’s what keeps me motivated. Else, I feel like no one is reading and I lose interest 🙂

35 thoughts on “IFYDGTH – Ch 39

  1. I cant wait for his pov! But yeah, if you are never in love, you will never know how it feels like. And even the most intelligent people might be an idiot once it comes to love loll

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I think she meant like the hen and chick. Maybe I should correct it. That analogy was inappropriate because it’s dealt a mother and baby relationship 😝

        Like

      2. I thinks she meant the rooster and hen, not chick because a rooster has many hens around him. I like simple stories too much miscommunication will make me drop a novel.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Hail to the queen!!! 😆 zy really tried hard to make her confess first 🤣

    Miumiu.. i think this is 2nd time you talked about chapter 40 (regarding ZY’s POV).. i have been counting to reach that chapter actually 😂😅.. n now knowing that it’s your favourite, I’m double excited to read it!

    Thanks miumiu 😘

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Yeah, me too…waiting to read his POV!
      This fluff is really good for my soul…especially today. It had been a very long day and the last thing i heard before I got into bed to read… was a sad story of a woman (my friend’s friend) who is lying in coma in the ICU. The doctors have just declared brain dead and tomorrow morning, they wre going to switch off the life support. Her youngest child is only 7!
      May she leaves in peace and love….

      I love how ZY tells her how much he is pining for her…insides twisitng in pain 😁

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Oh so sorry to hear about that…sometimes life is so cruel. And to lose your mom at such a young age is just tragic.
        Yes fluff helps us to balance the emotions. Truthfully , I pondered a lot on how to translate this…the literal Chinese translation is about the six hollow organs breaking down but I thought this was more poetic 😊
        Thanks for commenting…I’m Glad I helped a bit to navigate the vagaries of life

        Like

  3. Awwww, now I have to wait for Chapter40 after you just sold it to us? Nooooo! Dying to read it now, although to be honest I love all the stuff you post! Thank you, thank you, thank you!

    Liked by 2 people

  4. I could never understand where Mu Er gets her analogies, haha.
    But that is what makes her really charming and lovable.

    Thanks Miumiu.
    You all got us so excited about the next chapter, haha.

    😉

    Liked by 2 people

  5. That’s why I’ve been diligently commenting on every chapters, that drought after the first translator stopped was quite sad and painful for me. Because I love female characters that are shameless and oblivious like Mu Er.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Thank you for translating! I just started reading this 2 days ago.

    I saw you mentioning how some people were unfairly copying your material. One translator I know password protect her posts. Every new post has a new password which she discloses in her discord channel. This may be something you can consider if you would like to protect your work.

    Alternatively, I have seen other translators mentioning it and their readers go over to comment and let the readers know where the site of the original translated work is.

    Thank you for spreading the love of this novel! I like Jiu Xiao Qi’s work.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I am a silent reader, that’s all…

    but if what makes you happy is comments, I will try my best to comment… that’s all…

    thank you for the translation, have a great holiday… (*☻-☻*)

    Liked by 1 person

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