Loving You Is Too difficult – Ch 3.2

Had she sneaked out to party? He hoped so. No, he immediately changed his mind. He hoped she was in the bathroom. But the bathroom was dark and the door was open

Was she in the study? But when he passed by , the study was dark and empty…

“Hello, hello.” Suddenly a soft and familiar voice spoke out in astonishment. “ Why didn’t I hear you? When did you come in?”

The heavy weight in his heart immediately eased and he took in a long breath. For the moment, he was speechless.

After a few second, he finally spotted her on the other side of the bed. Her body was twisted into an impossible angle and position

“ What are you doing?” he asked after he ascertained he had identified her correctly

“ Yoga” she answered easily. Even her legs were twisted in an impossible angle, her hands were placed on her hand. But she seemed quite comfortable and was talking and smiling at him.

“ Why are you not sleeping ? Why are you doing yoga in the middle of the night?”

“ Because I could not sleep. Yoga is supposed to help you relax and sleep” She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, slowly exhaling and changed her posture.

Then, she opened one eye and looked at him. “ You can try it next time. You need to relax”

He crossed his arms and leaned against the door. His mouth curved in an unknowing smile. Relax? It was funny, but at this moment, he finally felt more relaxed than he had ever felt in the entire evening. The ‘main cause’ that made his anxious was also the one that could make him relax? He had actually left his colleagues in the bar just to talk to her about yoga? He was probably just tired.

“Are you ok? Can you sleep after doing your yoga?”He straightened up, intending to leave, ‘ then I’ll..”

Before he could finish,  Song Yu Shan jumped up and ran over to him. Before he could process it, a soft body threw itself in his arms. Se hugged his wasit tightly, almost restricting his breathing

“ What happened?” He tried to push her away from him

She refused to let him go and only clung on to him with more force. “ I thought you wouldn’t come”, her voice was muffled in his chest. “ I didn’t dare to sleep. I kept thinking that there was someone in the living room , or the kitchen..”

“ Didn’t I tell you no one could come in?” Xiang Yu stiffened slightly and tried to control himself, “ Let me go .Let’s talk about this.”

But she still refused to let him go. “ Don’t go back. Please don’t leave me alone, please…”

The soft body shivered in his arms like a little scared animal seeking shelter. But she wasn’t a scared animal but a beautiful girl. She was only wearing a vest with spaghetti straps and shorts. As she cuddled in his arms, the man was shocked to realise she wasn’t even wearing a bra!  Her body was soft and damned addictive, and she was quite generously endowed. As soon as he realised this, he understood that he needed to handle this very carefully. Otherwise he would be landing himself in big trouble!

“ Yu Shan…”

“ Don’t do this again”, she was engrossed in her own world and was still muttering, “ I am scared. Really scared. When you are here, I am no longer frightened..”

It wasn’t difficult for Xiang Yu to push her off with some force and disengage himself, but he hesitated. When he heard Song Yu Shan whisper that she was no longer frightened, he sighed.

She looked really helpless. She was obviously a timid and delicate girl. This should be the age when she was the most carefree. Instead she was faced with ugly threats no ordinary person could imagine. And none of this was her fault. She should only be worrying about her pocket money, whether she could afford the latest fashion on bags and shoes, which college she would attend when she went back to the US… these were relatively harmless and normal

He would rather see her like she was when they first met. When he thought she was arrogant and stupid, a spoilt rich kid. Instead, she now looked like a small helpless bird, or like a drowning person holding on to a piece of driftwood for dear life..

How could she be so insecure?

“ Okay. Let me go”. In the end, he still hardened his heart and pushed her away. The holding her arm, half- pushing her, he forced he to sit down on the bed. “ I am going to get you a glass of water. Drink that and go to sleep.”

“ No..” she groaned. Her head hung low as she refused to look up to him

She felt warm and safe in his arms. She wanted t hide in the secure shelter of his embrace for the rest of her life, protected from the cruel twists and turns of life. But Xiang Yu had no such wish. His arms belonged to others. He was only protecting her because it was his job and he was being paid for this.

But she was in love, and even if it was for a few seconds…

She liked the clean scent unique to him, his strong physique, his serious and handsome face, his meticulous , work oriented attitude…

He poured a glass of water and watched as she drank. Then he crossed his arms and leaned against the door as she put herself to bed and drew the quilt over herself. The big,amber eyes silently followed is every move

“ I’m not sleepy” After re-examining the doors and windows, he returned to see her lying wide awake.

“ Umm.. oh this!” He bent down to retrieve the plush dog that had fallen off the bed and stuffed it into her arms.” You cant sleep without this, right?”

Song Yu Shan smiled. Her small nose wrinkled and her smile was so sweet it melted the most hardened heart. He could not help it and reached out to muss the short hair on her forehead. ‘ Go to sleep. I have to make a call.”

She nodded and obediently closed her eyes.

His eyes lingered on her sweet face for a moment. Then he hardened his heart and turned away. Couldn’t he just sleep on the sofa for the rest of his life? He muttered out a hello to the guard and walked out of the building.

As he walked towards his card, he suddenly stopped. A familiar card was parked on the opposite kerb. The headlights were off, but there was certainly someone inside. He frowned and walked to the car.

“Why are you here?” he asked directly without bothering to be polite, “ Are you following me?”

“Following you?” Although she was caught red handed, she didn’t bother escaping and lowered the window. Her chin was lifted arrogantly and her anger was clearly visible on her face. “ Why would you worry about people following you? What have you done wrong that you feel guilty?”

“Feel guilty?”he shook his head wearily,” Shui Xin, you think too much. I just came over to check on her..”

“ That’s what took so long?” Shui Xin asked. “ You have been in there for more than an hour. I know very well what you were up to..”

He tightened his lips, no longer bothering to respond. His personality was such that he always clammed up when someone confronted him aggressively. His cold anger was visible on his face. If Shui Xin had been calm, she would realise from his countenance that he was ready to explode.

“You tell me! What were you doing? In the middle of the night, a man is alone with a woman. She has people on duty guarding her, but you can’t wait to come back to check up on her…”Yan Shui Xin continued, her voice rising, “ I never imagined you were this kind of a man!”

“Calm down, ok?”He stepped forward and placed his right hand on the window. He looked really annoyed. “Why are you talking to me like this?”

“ Talk ?What is there to talk about? You..” She looked up at him and suddenly her eyes widened in disbelief. Reaching out, she picked a long auburn hair from his short

This length, and the reddish color..

When he saw it, his face changed slightly.

“ Why is her hair on your shirt? You.. you…”

It would have happened when she hugged him. As he cursed silently, he felt a grudging admiration for Shu Xin’s eyesight. But how would he explain this? The more he tried to explain, the more convoluted it would get.

“Listen to me. It’s not what you think”, he tried to reason calmly. “ She was just scared. Think about what she has gone through recently. She is just a teenager..”

But Shui Xin was in no mood to hear anything. Her eyes were full of tears. “ Go away!” she shouted, “I don’t want to ever see you again! You’re a bastard! Go back to the little princess and be her watchdog. Go!”

After that, she started her car and speeded away in an instant.

Xiang Yu watched as her car turned the corner and disappeared in the dark night He sighed deeply. He really couldn’t do anything else.